*Enters the room waving*
Hello everyone! And welcome back once again. How ya been? Hopefully good.
[Quick Toast: Happy NYE everyone! *raises a glass* May your 2017 be a hell of a lot better than 2016. Gotta admit for me personally, I am so done with this year and I’m glad it’s coming to an end. If you had a great 2016 more power to you and I hope the blessing keep pouring in for 2017. If you had a crappy 2016…like moi. May you finally get the break you really do deserve and I hope nothing but positive energy and luck comes your way. So once again, let’s all raise our glasses to a bright…happy…2017! To new beginnings…to ending one chapter and starting a new one. Or if you’re fed up with the book that you are reading/writing/in: to ditching an old book and starting a new one. Happy New Years everyone!]
I know it’s been a hot minute since we last chatted so lets do a quick recap.
Met the nurse practitioner, who looked over my medicine that the doctors had me on and she’s like “why do they have you on this, for the type of migraines you have-these actually trigger more migraines. You not being able to keep food or the medicines down really limits us to what we can do. Well, I do have another patient who suffers from Hemiplegic Migraines he prefers this type of cocktail of drugs would you like to give it a try?”First day I tried the new meds, felt so much better at the doctors my migraine pain was like 7.5 after taking the meds 2 hours later the pain level was one. The next day I was completely fine, for once I actually had energy and I was over sensitive to anything sounds, smells lights. Also I wasn’t nauseous! Although, I did randomly vomit at some point in the day; that was weird to do projectile vomit with no warning, but I still felt great, I actually went well enough to the point where I wanted to go out and talk to random strangers and ask them how they were, but the horrible weather outside was like . Then the day after the migraines came back…Long story short the medicine isn’t working anymore. I feel like my migraines are getting stronger and i might be building up a tolerance to my medicine, even my anti-nausea medicine that i use to help keep my medicine down isn’t working I’m popping at least 3 of those pills, when at the beginning with one pill I would be fine for the whole day.
Still need to see an optometrist for my eyes I’ve been getting shadows and double visions and I think i need to see a G.I. to find out why am I not keeping food down. at the doctors office it said I weigh 115LB but I was wearing my steel toe boots and layers that day. I placed my hands on my hip today at work-and the first thought that came to mind was “wait did I loose more weight since Saturday?!” Maybe I should start doing weights I feel like my arm strength isn’t as good as it use to be….It sucks watching myself deteriorate especially, when people start complaining around me about how they need to “lose” weight. While i’m over here thinking “You don’t know how lucky you have it; you get to eat a plate of food you don’t have to worry about hurling it back up. Or,Hungry yet nauseous all the time.” *side note at my job in order to keep your insurance premiums low you have to do a health evaluation and make healthy choices that you enter into a computer. But due to my health…I gotta be real, I feel like shit 98% of the time i’m in pain all the time I don’t want to exercise and last thing I need to do is lose and more fucking weight if anything I need to be on the anti-diet!On another note, due to 2016 being a horrible, crappy year. I was a total Miss Anti-Holiday. I didn’t feel as though my family members deserved gifts, so after years of them saying “This holiday sucks” (especially, when they got hundreds of dollars worth of stuff and I only got $20 for myself) or “Oh great, now I have to get you something too!” (Even though, I told them “no you don’t, you are not obligated to return the favor, which they never did.”) *That and I had to pay for my crown (I’m done with the dentist, they wanted to do a few more fillings but i’m like “I’m done”.) so due to a lack of funds, I used my money for food (we had agreed prior that for Christmas dinner it would simple Soups and Sandwiches) no one help me pay for it, I made enough to last a few days I felt like bro ate more than his fair share (I would come home with a pounding migraine, he’s literally here ALL DAY LONG with a fridge full of food, but he won’t eat that. Nope, hates to cook his own but LOVES my sandwiches)
. The family decided on 7 days of seafood tradition (I hate that tradition-and wanted no partake in it so the sandwiches were supposed to cover me for those days -mom and bro ate my food.) later on that day, when asked where are the presents told them there were none.
NYE, due to a lack of funds, and hardly any food in the house. I saw no need to celebrate. I didn’t even watch the ball drop. All I could think was the past couple of years have not been kind to me. Why celebrate 2017, if this (looks around the room) is how it’s gonna be. When I woke up, I heard Mariah Carey had given a horrible performance in NYC.
January 2017- (excerpt from a convo with a friend)
guess what happened to me this morning? so I told you about the lack of gas yesterday right, mom said she would ask bro for some cash. So this morning I asked her if she was able to get the cash since both cars were on empty (i put what was left of extra gas we had in the garage in car it was enough to get me to work and half way home) So i wake her up and she asks me yet again “You don’t have any money?”She literally asked me that ten hours ago. to which my reply was still “no” so she hands me her card. I go to cumberland farms try to use the card but it wanted the pin. So I took two guesses and failed. finally called mom, of course she doesn’t answer her phone. And i’m thinking “oh you’ve got to be kidding me!” So I drive to work with my eye on gas tank hoping the car doesn’t die in the middle of street. I make it work and send mom a text about the needing the pin from the parking lot. Now it’s time to leave work before I do i check my phone I got the pin, so I go to the Sunoco on Nott Street this station (I don’t need the pin) at this point i’ve had a migraine since 8 AM and now it’s very strong, I come across a woman who looks like a character out of a harry potter movie (the tea lady) if you’ve seen it. And there is this big angry looking Asian man pacing in front of station. The lady asked me if I was busy (I think she needed help) I told her I Was b/c my migraine was getting really strong ( I was at that point where i’m like I need this gas to pump faster before my migraine gets too strong and I won’t be able to drive) I get the gas and would you believe I drove off with the gas door and hup cap hanging at the side. turned on to one street that was very narrow don’t know where i was or if it was a one way to fix the hup cap. Surprisingly the hup cap incident didn’t shock me too much b/c of the location of my migraine -I know when I get it there my short term memory is f*cked and I tend to make more mistakes and forget things. I pulled into someone’s space or perhaps it was there home drive way….I did a three point turn and made it home safely. There is literally enough gas to get me there,back and there again which is fine since payday is Thursday providing bro does not take the car As for today, my watched died, forgot to put the new stickers on the car, went the wrong way to work (technically it’s the correct way but it takes longer, thus I used up more gas than I wanted too) at that point in drive I started verbally expressing myself and how I feel that my guardian angel hasn’t been doing her job for past few years, and I want to upgrade to someone else. Needless to say upon saying that about two minutes later, my watch came back to life. To which I replied “oh, you fixing this does NOT negate everything else that has gone wrong!”
BTW: took an astrological quick 2017 astrological chart reading on several sites. First site said “this was not my year”. Other site said “your job will become obsolete and you’ll get let go in the second half of the year.” And the third site is like “holy crap you’ve been hit with a lot of bad luck these few years which is odd because your chart indicate your life shouldn’t be this hard good news is its a transition year that means you’re in for some big changes but you’re gonna get hit with one more horrible thing.before it gets better.’. Me : seriously. The reading I got in 2016 says accident, near death but I survive -I’ll be injured but I will get over it and move to brighter days I’m just like “I’m not looking forward to that hospital bill!” But I don’t mind the food but on the off chance the food has gone down hill since 06 I hope someone sneaks me in good seasoning Lol I can imagine the look on the nurses face when she strolls in to check my vitals “what are you doing!?” Me: making the food tasty, its missing fat and butter I am not down with this healthy crap! and no; I will neither give you my butter or my spices we are in a recession!
Well, that about covers it, hope everyone else has been having a much better time than me.